I'm taking this blog in a slightly different direction. Yesterday I spoke with one of my editors about voice. And I realized I don't really know what my voice sounds like. There are nights I've driven myself crazy trying to write, and I realize now, that's because I'm trying to produce what I think they want versus what I write. Turns out I don't have to do that, but I do have to figure out what I sound like on paper. So this blog provides a way for me to experiment with my voice.
Yet alongisde starting over with my writing, I'm starting over with my life, too. I tried out a new position in sales that. . . well, didn't go so well. And what I learned was that it wasn't the right career fit for me. But I also realized that I can't escape the allure that my college past has left behind. I miss that environment. And it turns out the school setting is where I do my best work and feel the most like myself. I love school, I love reading literature, I love discussing literature, I love writing, and I love waking up with a coffee and going to class. I love EVERYTHING about it. . . okay, minus the homework part. And when it comes down to it, I want to go back.
I question whether or not I have what it takes to be an English professor. But that's where I see myself going. Maybe not at the University level, but definitely at the Comunnity College level. So that's the next step I suppose. I will be working my way through college. But as eager as I am to start, like, tomorrow, I'm going to wait until after my wedding. Because, let's face it, I love, love, LOVE, wedding planning :-). So I want to enjoy every minute of it without any distractions.
So I feel good. I feel right about this decision and the direction I'm going. I KNOW that while I'm doing it. . . it's going to be so rough. Living paycheck to paycheck, having NO time for myself. . . haha, yeah you get the idea. But I really do love school, so I know that the juice is worth the squeeze (that one's for you Robert;)).
